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In all probability you have all the good desires in the world of wanting to stop the break up of your marriage and win your ex-lover back , but you could in reality be fumbling along instead. Instead of piecing up all the disputes and winning back your ex-lover, you could be further damaging the relationship.

Check whether you are making any of these ten break up blunders.

When you communicate to your ex-lover that leaving is not the best solution : .

Not only does this convince them to leave, but it also supports their feelings that they were stupid enough to get into a relationship with you in the first place.

Give a call just when the relationship has split .

Your love has finished with you and this should make it clear that they need some space right now and the last thing they need is to listen to you.

Drunk Dialing :

Alcohol can play havoc with your emotions right now as soon after a few drinks you feel like to talking to your ex.

Leaving tons of email and voice mail messages :

These actions never help, without a doubt it may make the situation take a turn for the worse.

Informing your ex how low, lonely or sad you have been since the break up :

You are probably seeking to tickle your ex's sympathy nerves, but in reality you are getting to be really arrogant and desperate to your ex. Psychologically speaking this type of behavior is termed as ‘manipulative' and can throw a stick badly in any relationship.

Talking about the breakup and turning up bad incidents from the past where there were crucial conflicts or fights.

This would undoubtedly draw attention and could possibly result in some conversation but think about it, is this the way you would like to utilize your time? This is really ineffective both in the short and long term and in some way keeps you where you began.

Continually showing your ever-lasting love:

Please note that even if your ex-lover understood the profoundness and intensity of your love, this is really not the prime concern at this time, or else the ex would not have become an lost lover. This is the right time to view the position in a totally new light and analyze the past to find what exactly went bad instead than banking on the strength of your love to help you tide over the situation.

Admitting your sorrow over and over again .

Perhaps you did something awfully wrong like not keeping a promise or two timing. An apology is in order, but you have to know the correct way to make an good apology and rarely anyone knows how this is done. You also need to be careful not to ask for a pardon too soon. Just In Case you believe you have not done anything which demands you apologizing, then you are being unjustified with yourself as you are making serious compromises here and that is not a bold trait in one's character.

Seeking to make your ex-lover envious

This may work temporarily as most people are controlling by nature, but it cannot affect the grounds for the break up or better the situation in any way. If all you are depending on is manipulative maneuvers to try and win your ex back you will end up with a somewhat twisted relationship that will be even tougher to keep going for the long term.

Pleading with them to take you back :

Let me tell you something here. Anyone worth his salt and positive about him or herself would never turn that desperate, which warrants being backwards merely to get back some person in life. Now that you know what the common mistakes individuals make trying to win over their ex back, you could spend some time in recapitulating as to the reasons why the relationship turned sour, how to alter things and then plan out a more intelligent strategy to get back your ex lover.

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Despite all your endeavors to stay off a break up and make up again with your ex, you might be in reality precipitating the crisis. You could well be stifling the state of affairs even further rather than winning back your ex's heart.

Are you committing any of these ten breakup blunders?

The first is when you tell your ex lover the tremendous error he or she is making by calling it quits. This does not dissuade them to stop the breakup instead they start thinking what a bad decision it was to to take you on to begin with.

Ringing too soon after the break up:

Your ex-lover has broken up with you and this should make it clear that they need some space at the moment and the very last thing they wish is to hear from you.

Drunk Dialing:

You have a few more drinks than normal, and you let your heart rule over your head, you dial your ex lovers' number simply wanting to talk.

Sending mailbox full of e mails or innumerable messages on voice mail:

This truly won't help your situation and will probably just make affairs worse.

Showing your feelings of being lost:

Desperate and low with your lost lover since the time both of you broke up. You are in all probability seeking to tickle your lost lover's sympathy nerves, but actually you are getting to be very dominating and desperate to your ex. This actually falls under the category of manipulative behaviors, and however unplanned, it will deliver a real sledge hammer blow to the relationship.

Discussing the breakup:

Digging up bad incidents from the past where there were crucial conflicts or fights. This would sure enough grab your ex's attention and might make them communicate but is this the best way to pass valuable quality time? This kind of action is kind of juvenile and would never get you anywhere, so you are stuck from where you started.

Affirming your never-ending love through repeated assertions:

Even if you think that your ex-lover doesn't understand how much you genuinely love them, obviously that is not the problem right now or they would not have gone. This is the right time to view the position in a wholly new light and analyze the past to find what exactly went bad instead than banking on the force of your love to help you tide over the situation.

Apologizing over and over and over again:

Perhaps you did something dreadfully bad like not keeping a promise or two timing. Pleading for a pardon is probably justified but not very many know the art of seeking a pardon. You also don't want to make the slip up of apologizing too soon. In case you believe you have not done anything which involves you saying sorry, then you are being unreasonable with yourself as you are making serious compromises here and that is not a bold trait in one's character.

Trying to make your ex-partner jealous:

This could be a short-term and workable strategy as most people like to have individual rights over their lovers but this can never give you any clue to the break up and help you resolve the crisis in any way. If all you are depending on is tricky tactics to try and win your ex back you will end up with a somewhat twisted relationship that will be even tougher to keep going for the long term.

Begging with them to help you come back:

I'll let you in on a little secret here. Those people who are emotionally secure would never need someone so urgently that they would sacrifice their self respect to try and get them back by begging. Now that you know what the common mistakes individuals make trying to win over their ex back, you could spend some time in recapitulating as to the reasons why the relationship turned sour, how to alter things and then plan out a more intelligent strategy to get back your ex lover.

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Are you feeling like everything you do pushes your ex further away ? Is this describing your situation to a tee? Are you asking yourself "What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back" at every possible moment? Here are some tips that will greatly improve your chances for you getting back together with your ex boyfriend.

Obviously right now you are serious about saving or rekindling your relationship, which is what led you to this article in the first place. But if you are feeling overly anxious to get your ex back, you may be behaving in the wrong way, causing your ex to pull away naturally. It is human nature in general to resist this kind of pressure. Struggling against human nature is a completely pointless procedure, and it will only make matters worse in the long run.

Are you calling your ex too much, constantly writing him e-mails or sending text messages to him? Are you trying to make him feel sorry for you? If you are doing these things, stop! If you are asking yourself " What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back?", then you need to stop doing those things right now.

So, What can you do to get your ex boyfriend back? Well for starters follow this strategy instead of what you have been doing.

You are going to have to take a completely fresh approach to this situation. Begin by breaking off contact for a while, doing your own thing. During this time while there is no communication between you and your ex boyfriend, you can focus on ways that you can improve your own personal life, rather than dwelling on the relationship issues at hand. This is going to be a hard and challenging time, and it is going to require discipline to prevent you from returning to your old ways.

During this time, your ex is going to experience a shift in how he feels about you, since you will no longer be pursuing him. You may become mysterious to him in some ways, because he is not sure what you are doing or feeling. This is actually something that can work in your favor. Now your ex is in a position to actually miss you, which is not possible when you were smothering him.

You must remember that the key to this strategy and repairing a break up is to work with human nature rather than attempting to work against it. If you are wondering " What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back?", now you should have a fairly basic understanding on how common mistakes can be avoided. Once you implement this basic strategy you can restore a balance and allow your ex to remember why he loved you in the first place.

Just keep yourself grounded and avoid smothering him. Make yourself appear mysterious and he will be reminded why he loved you in the first place. Play a little hard to get (don't over do it) and let him make the first move, and you will come out on top. And then you will stop asking "What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back?"

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